cold wind

mercy please
dear god, I ache for you
I miss just being next to you
the confliction rages in you
your public face
speaks cold
but I know
your private thoughts
and I miss your warm

fair and noble
there is no blame
but I still carry you
inside me
your silence
however necessary
floods my consciousness
with torment
where was I when you became so integral?
cold, hard wind blows rough
I see you watch me
conflicted also
I walk away